.Editor's Note: The following is the message of a character coming from Exploration Three Leader Frank L. Culbertson (Captain, USN Resigned), reassessing the activities of September 11.September 12, 2001 7:34 p.m.I haven't created significantly about specifics of this particular goal in the course of the month I've been here, generally for two causes: the initial being that there has been actually very little bit of time to accomplish that type of composing, and also secondly due to the fact that I'm not exactly sure how relaxed I am sharing thought and feelings I show friends and family along with the remainder of the planet.Well, clearly the planet transformed today. What I state or even perform is actually quite slight matched up to the value of what took place to our nation today when it was assaulted through ... through whom? Terrorists is actually all we understand, I reckon. Hard to understand at whom to drive our rage as well as fear ...I had just completed a number of tasks today, the best lengthy being actually the physical examinations of all workers members. In a private talk complying with that, the flight plastic surgeon informed me they were having a very negative day on the ground. I had no concept ...He illustrated the scenario to me as absolute best he knew it at ~ 0900 CDT. I was astonished, after that terrified. My first thought and feelings was that this wasn't a genuine chat, that I was still listening closely to one of my Tom Clancy tapes. It simply really did not appear feasible on this incrustation in our country. I could not even visualize the details, also just before the updates of additional destruction began can be found in.Vladimir dropped in rather quickly, noticing that something extremely serious was actually being covered. I swayed Michael into the element as well. They were likewise impressed and also stunned. After our team authorized off, I tried to detail to Vladimir as well as Michael as best I can the potential size of the act of terror in midtown New york and also at the Pentagon. They clearly knew as well as were actually incredibly compassionate.I glanced at the Globe Map on the computer to find where over the planet our experts were actually as well as saw that our team were happening southeast out of Canada as well as would certainly be skipping New England in a couple of moments. I whized around the station until I discovered a home window that will offer me a sight of New York City and snatched the closest cam. It happened to be a video camera, and I was actually appearing southern from the window of Michael's log cabin.The smoke appeared to possess a weird bloom to it at the foundation of the column that was streaming south of the urban area. After reading among the news articles our experts only obtained, I feel our company were actually looking at NY around the moment of, or not long after, the crash of the second tower. Exactly how horrendous ...I swept the electronic camera during the East Shore to the south to view if I could possibly find some other smoke around Washington, or even anywhere else, yet nothing was visible.It was quite complicated to think about job afterwards, though our experts had some to do, yet on the upcoming track our company moved across the United States more southern. All three of us were functioning 1 or 2 cameras to attempt to get views of The big apple or Washington. There was actually fog over Washington, yet no certain source can be seen. Everything appeared unbelievable from two to three hundred kilometers away. I can't visualize the unfortunate settings on the ground.Aside from the emotional impact of our country being actually dealt with and hundreds of our people as well as maybe some close friends being eliminated, one of the most difficult emotion being where I am actually is among solitude.Next time ... I guess the exhaustion and mental tension received the most effective of me. I couldn't remain awake and also continue to write. Today was actually still tough, but our experts began acquiring additional information, plus our company possessed the honor of talking straight along with the Center Supervisor, Roy Estess, that ensured us that the ground staffs would continue to function and ensure our safety and security, and also the risk-free function of the Station. Our team likewise talked to our Administrator, Mr. Goldin, that incorporated that the companions in the System are actually all completely dedicated to carrying on secure operations and help. These were actually never concerns for me. I understand all these people! The ground groups have been surprisingly helpful, really understanding of the influence of the updates, and have actually tried to be as practical as possible. They have all been actually very specialist and also centered though I can not visualize the interruption of the type of news coming in as well as the idea that federal government structures could be at risk. They never ever bypassed a beat, also when relocating control centers. And a group of senior workers and good friends gave our team a fairly detailed rundown about what was known and what was being done in the authorities and at NASA on Tuesday afternoon, which was actually very beneficial and type of all of them to do in the middle of all the distress. The Russian TsUP has actually also been encouraging and practical, trying to uplink news articles when our very own properties were inoperable, and also stating kind terms ...My crewmates have actually been actually great, as well. They understand it is actually been a challenging time for me and also the individuals on the ground, and also they've made an effort to be as also keeled and also valuable as feasible. Michael even corrected me my beloved Borscht soup for dinner. As well as they give me plenty of area to believe when I required it. They are actually extremely thoughtful as well as certainly outraged at whoever would certainly do this.I understand so many folks in Washington, a lot of people who take a trip to DC and New York City, numerous who are actually aviators, that I felt certain I would obtain a minimum of a couple of pieces of bad news over the upcoming handful of times. I acquired the initial one today when I knew that the Captain of the American Airlines plane that hit the Government was Chic Burlingame, a friend of mine. I met Chic during plebe summertime when our company remained in the D&B together, as well as we possessed lots of lessons with each other. I can't imagine what he should of undergone, as well as now I listen to that he may possess increased better than our company can easily even think of by possibly preventing his airplane coming from being actually the one to attack the White Property. What an awful loss, however I ensure Chic was fighting fearlessly to the end. As well as rips do not flow the exact same precede ...It's difficult to define exactly how it really feels to be the only American completely off the world at a time including this. The sensation that I ought to exist with every one of you, coping with this, assisting somehow, is actually mind-boggling. I recognize that our company perform the threshold (or even past) of a terrible switch in the past history of the world. A lot of points will certainly certainly never coincide once again after September 11, 2001. Certainly not merely for the 1000s and lots of folks straight influenced by these horrible actions of violence, yet possibly for we all. We will certainly discover ourselves experiencing in a different way concerning lots of things, including perhaps space expedition, regrettably.It is actually horrendous to find smoke putting coming from injuries in your personal country coming from such an awesome angle. The duality of performing a space probe committed to improving daily life on the planet and enjoying lifestyle being actually ruined through such unforced, dreadful acts is jolting to the subconscious, despite who you are actually. And also the know-how that every little thing will definitely be various than when our experts launched due to the opportunity our experts land is actually a little bit of disconcerting. I have confidence in our nation as well as in our leadership that our experts are going to do whatever achievable to better shield her and our households, as well as to take justice of what has been actually performed. I possess assurance that the excellent folks at NASA will perform every little thing essential to proceed our objective safely and securely and also return us safely and securely at the right time. As well as I miss out on each of you significantly. I can not exist with you face to face, as well as our experts have a very long way to head to accomplish our goal, but be specific that my heart is actually with you, and know you reside in my requests.Submissively, Frank.September 14, 2001 10:49 p.m. An update to the last letter ... Thankfully, it is actually been an active week up here. As well as to show that, like our nation, our experts are actually continuing on our planned road with service customarily (as long as achievable). Tonight the current addition to the place, the Russian Docking Chamber will definitely be released from Baikonur, Kazakhstan. On Sunday evening (United States opportunity), it will dock along with us, at a slot never ever utilized just before on the low point side of the Company Component. This new component will certainly provide our company another area to dock an Improvement or even Soyuz and also will supply a huge airlock with 2 useable hatches for administering EVA's in Russian Orlan satisfies, which our experts will do a few of just before our company come home.The issue prior to in taking care of today was actually insufficient updates. The problem right now is excessive. It came simultaneously when e-mail was actually rejuvenated, and also there is actually inadequate time to review all of it! Plus it's as well tough to manage all of it instantly. However I cherish obtaining it, and I really value the great letters of support as well as friendship I am actually receiving.Our company are actually flourishing on board, acquiring our work done, and referring to factors. Last night our company had a long discussion over supper concerning the implication of these activities, the feasible actions to comply with, and also what need to be done. After supper, Michael made a point of telling me that every email he obtained from buddies in Russia said exclusively to inform me just how regretful they were that this happened, prolonging their condolences, and also asking exactly how I was actually carrying out. Vladimir showed me the Russian term for "condolences" after speaking to the previous CDR, Yuri Usachev, on the phone in Celebrity Metropolitan area. (Both the Russian and the English phrases are a lot very long to articulate quickly.) Really kind people.For the last 2 days, the Russian MCC has actually been good enough to broadcast online shows of broadcast news concerning the activity as well as connected stories, to be sure I was effectively notified. Every professional who has actually come on free throw line to go over a treatment or a concern has at some factor expanded introductions to me along with kind words. Tonight the Russian capcom informed our company that due to the wedding day of remembrance in the US, all the time individuals had been actually taking florals as well as edging all the wall surfaces of the US embassy in Moscow, as well as this night they were lighting candles in the road outside the embassy. How the globe has actually altered.Individuals everywhere seem to recognize the senselessness and terror within this attack. And the enormous reduction. Moscow has actually dealt with these sort of problems in the last couple of years with home and also subway battles, so they are actually as anxious to eliminate this danger as our experts are. However all-time low product line is actually that there are actually really good folks just about everywhere who intend to live in tranquility. I read that a child inquired, "America is so excellent to other nations, we constantly assist everybody, exactly how can they loathe our team so much?".I wish the instance of collaboration and also leave that this spacecraft plus all the people in the program display daily are going to sooner or later inspire the rest of the planet to operate similarly. They must!Regrettably, our company will not be piloting over the United States while people are lighting candle lights. Do not recognize if our company could possibly see that anyhow. Our company carried out, nevertheless, view an incredibly unique as well as attractive attraction a few mins ago: the launch of our Docking Compartment on a Soyuz booster. Our company were overtaking it and it appeared concerning three mins after its launch from Baikonur as the sunlight struck our station, so it was actually still in the dark. It looked like a sizable comet along with a right, broad tail silhouetted versus the black planet beneath. In spite of some negative lighting for a while as the sunlight attacked our window at a reduced perspective, I managed some online video of it as first our team passed the spacecraft, and afterwards enjoyed it start to mesmerize as it gained elevation and also speed. I recorded till primary motor cutoff and booster splitting up happened just as our experts moved toward sunup on the Mountain ranges. A remarkable attraction in a memorable full week ...Life takes place, even in space. We're here to stay ... Frank.